Be Stimulated By Rejection

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Let's talk rejection.  I like to be authentic and transparent on my blog and confide in you about questions I would ask myself.  How do you deal with rejection in your professional life?

I am very green, having only started blogging roughly six months ago, and I can tell you with most certainty, that it has taken me out of my hypothetical "comfort zone" and forced me to face some plaguing fears.  Fears are difficult to overcome, but once you have successfully conquered one you feel like you can face them all head on.

How does fear tie into rejection?  Are we not all somewhat fearful of rejection?  How do we deal with it on a professional level without becoming jaded, cynical and bitter?'s hard, but in any industry, you're going to deal with set backs, so it is how you handle them that will determine your longevity.

Since this is a fashion blog, I want to apply this question directly to myself and a specific experience I have had in creating content for my site.  When I started conceptualizing posts, I wanted to include one editorial piece per week.  That was my goal, so I reached out to bloggers, brands, and organizations that I felt would work well with the voice of my blog as well showcase people I have long admired.  I was off to a fantastic start, having connected and secured interviews with two of the most notable bloggers in the world plus other fascinating fashion-based companies.

Maybe I had gotten too big for my britches, but I thought, heck why not reach for the stars (not literally, of course) and contact one of the biggest names in the industry right now.  So I methodically planned out exactly what I was going to say, ruminating over every sentence as if I were writing a speech for Class President. Once I was comfortable with what I had written, I shot the e-mail off and crossed my fingers for a response.  Hours went by, then days and months before I came to the realization that this person was not going to get back to me.  I was disappointed to say the least.  Disappointment then lead to neurotically questioning everything from my writing skills to my lack of relevancy.  This is a vicious cycle that's difficult to deviate away from once your mind is already there.

At that point you can do two things: You can either give up or you can keep pursuing your ambitions until eventually someone says "yes".  I chose to do the latter and have continued to seek out people and companies who I find to be admirable, and even if they do not get back to me, they still know my name, and I am okay with that.  Do not let fear nor your ego get in the way of future successes.

Lives are hectic, requests are innumerable, competition is fierce, so you cannot take rejection personally because it is not a reflection of who you are, but a circumstance.  All I can say is keep plugging along. Not obtaining what you want right away, will humble you and increase your drive, which is why it's so important to experience it.

As the great Sylvester Stallone once said "I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up, and get going, rather than retreat."

And there you have it folks!



  1. I think this post can resonate with EVERYONE- because we all have gone through it at one point, or will eventually! You can't let this person get you down- because you already did your best, and did your part. It's unfortunate but they probably lost a reader demographic that possibly wasn't already on their site by not doing your interview.

    I'm proud of you for sticking with your vision of how you want this site to be and executing on it. Keep going girl, reach for those stars- no matter how far away they seem.

    xo Carlina

  2. Love your honesty! Rejection should be your alarm clock!! Happy to hear you kept on going! We love following your blog!!!

    Trendy Mondays - your online fashion destination for independent European designer brands

  3. Thank you so much! I think it's important to share our very "human" experiences with everyone, because it's our disappointments that help to define us.

    I'm glad you can relate.

    Love you girl and very proud to call you my friend.


  4. Thank you Trendy Mondays for all of your support!

    Love you ladies,

  5. Alex, I can definitely relate to this. Not with my blog because I haven't taken that sort of risk yet, but with my professional life. When I first began my career I would get rejected daily! It stung so bad I would cry alone in public restroom stalls.

    All I can say is someday that man or woman will see your name in he New York Times (or something as prestigious) and weep.

    You rock. Keep it up!


  6. You are the sweetest! I highly doubt that, but I appreciate your confidence. :)

    Rejection is part of life...and I do feel like it's good to experience it.

    I think you kick major ass and your resiliency makes you so so good at what you do.



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